Memorable

Okay, EVERY time I log in to Blogger, I check the "Remember me" box--you know, the one that's supposed to automatically populate my username and/or password the next time I return to the website from the same computer--and it NEVER remembers me.

I've checked that box about a million times.  (Two million, actually.)  Still doesn't work.  EVER.

I find it personally insulting.

MOJ

Experience

Had two amazing experiences yesterday.  The first was that I did my first-ever jury trial.  Very sobering experience--I’ll have to write about that another time.  The second experience was an after-bedtime conversation with S.

I’ve had a lot of “lousy parent” moments lately—frustrating moments where I can’t seem to understand or get through to my children.  But as I was listening to a General Conference talk by Jairo Mazzagardi this week, it struck me that, when asked a question of eternal significance by his grand-daughter, he “silently prayed for inspiration” before he answered her.  I realized, of course, that I have done very little of that, and I resolved to try to remember.

So last night, S told me about something he's sort of given up on, spiritually.  I remembered Elder Mazzagardi and prayed for help.  And the most amazing thing happened.

I talked to my son.

Only, it wasn’t like it usually is, where I talk at him and he throws out one tangential concern after another to disregard everything I say.

We spoke about what repentance is, about how change takes time, about the Parable of the Pickle, and about how God’s vision is so much larger than ours (2 Peter 3:8) that He loves the eternal us: the “now us” and the 96-year old us (and beyond).  That insight was powerful—for both of us. 

I was reminded that God loves my boy even more than I do (much more than I do), and that if I can tap into the grand vision of who my son really is, I could love him more.

I was also reminded that God loves the eternal me, just as He loves the eternal S.  And if I can tap into the grand vision of who I really am, it might just change how I feel about my own life journey.
It was clearly as much a lesson for me as it was for him—something both of us need to learn, something I wish someone had told me when I was ten.

More Random Things

Because my first list was so incomplete, here are a few more:

1. I can't name all of my parents' siblings, let alone the fifty bzillion cousins I have.
2. I still don't know what Trigonometry is for.
3. I regularly cheat on my longstanding relationship with junk food.
4. As a teen, I learned that when my dad holds a full cup of Sprite over your head, "You wouldn't!" is NOT the right thing to say. (I learned, on the same day, that Sprite gets stickier and stickier over the course of a two-hour drive home.)
   
5. I've been out of the United States several times, but never by more than a few miles.
   
6. My 3rd-grade teacher, Mrs. Helms, taught us to play a few songs on the ukulele. Man, we rocked!
7. I own one bow tie, which I love because, unlike a necktie, it never flops into water fountains, paper shredders, toilets, or spaghetti. Had I the resources and a few more scoops of social audacity, I would replace ALL of my neckties with bow ties and never wear another necktie as long as I live.
8. My parents abandoned me in Las Vegas when I was five.
9. When Catica asked me if I would marry her, my answer was (and I quote) "Heck, yeah."  
• I'm sure I could have come up with something better if I'd have had a chance to think. The whole thing just took me by surprise, given that she was on the phone with someone else at the time.
10. I lost my hearing on my left side in my late 20s.  Because of that, I can't tell where specific sounds come from.
• This can really be disorienting at times, like when I'm crossing a street and someone, somewhere, honks their horn. Can't tell if it's directed at me, so I never know whether I'm moments from being roadkill or not.
11. Though it often took me a long time to get to sleep when I was growing up, I now fall asleep within 3 minutes of lying down.
12. I am slowly overcoming a fear of flying. I am now fairly comfortable on relatively short flights. Anything over the ocean is out of the question.
13. It was the fourth grade spelling bee. After everyone else was eliminated, Chelsa and I battled it out through a dozen or so rounds that were too easy for either of us. Eventually, I got careless and started rattling off the answers without thinking. "C-H-I-K-E-N" lost me the bee. I haven't misspelled that word since.
    
14. Sometimes I wear brown shoes with a black belt. (Take that, Sneetch Police!)
15. During a Boy Scout meeting when I was a teenager, an irate leader (who shall remain nameless) slammed me up against a wall and shouted threats at me. 
• I didn't deserve it. 
• Seriously.
  
16. It is very difficult to find glasses that fit me.  The bridge of my nose apparently measures about 21 mm, and the bridge of nearly every pair of glasses on the planet is . . . well . . . smaller than 21 mm.
    
17. I've learned you should never underestimate an angry person's ability to accurately arc a large rock up into the air and down onto the top of your head--even when they are really far away.
18. I've done some interpreting for the Deaf, but my signing skills are at that annoying place where non-signers think you're amazing and signers think you're an idiot.
19. I recently discovered that I like pickles on salad.
20. My heart rate is slower than yours.
21. Contact lenses make my eyes bleed.
22. I like cake, but only if it's stale.  
23. I hope to eventually hunt down and destroy every childhood photo ever taken of me.
24. When I was a kid, I couldn't stand eggs.  Mom tried several different preparation/condiment approaches, but they always made me sick.  I would rather go to school hungry than eat them.  Now, I like them quite a bit, especially scrambled.  
• Still hate oatmeal, though.
25. I sincerely hope to finish college before my children start college.
26. I recently realized that I have long held three major goals in life: (1) to never wear cuff links for any reason, (2) to never own a car that I have to park far away from everyone else's, and (3) to determinedly split infinitives at every opportunity.

MOJ

Jack Attack

This summer, I told Jonny that "Jonny" isn't the only nickname that can go with the name "Jonathan."  When I mentioned several other possibilities, he grabbed a hold of the name "Jack," and it stuck.  So if you've heard us mention Jack, it is NOT because we've had another baby! I have since learned that I was wrong about "Jack" being a traditional nickname for "Jonathan."  As it turns out, "Jack" is a nickname for "John," and "John" is a nickname for "Jonathan."  So "Jack" is, technically speaking, "Jonathan's" nickname's nickname. Technicalities!  Ugh! And besides, what's a little error margin among friends?  Jack doesn't seem to mind at this point, and I'm relatively certain it won't cause any more lasting damage than he's already subject to just by being a member of my family.  If he turns out to be a wreck, for example, it could just as well have been from the fact that I've told him his hair is really pasta, since it's the exact same color and shape of a pile of spaghetti. The best thing about the new nickname is that it has already evolved into a newER nickname--just one of the many, MANY fringe benefits of being born into the Nicknamiest Family on the Planet.  So in addition to Jack, he is also now "Jack Attack," a term that has also developed into a verb--quite possibly the newest official verb in the English language. To be Jack Attacked means to get a particular kind of hug--the kind of hug that brims with unqualified childlike love, the kind of hug that melts away gloom in an instant, the kind of hug that can only come from a heart-of-gold five-year old with pasta-hair. If you haven't had one yet, you have no idea what you're missing.

Race #5 (July) -- MARATHON!

Okay, so maybe, "Race #5" isn't the right term to use, since the word "race" makes it sound like I was competing against someone else and, truth is, I was the only runner in the event!

But still, I am officially now a MARATHON SURVIVOR!!!

I mentioned, a few months ago, that I'd been wanting to run a marathon, but wasn't sure I could really handle it.  So it was just a "someday" goal.  Instead, I made specific plans to run smaller races this summer--one per month.  (Blogged about that HERE.)  I ran a 5K in March, another in April, another in May, and a 10K in June.

This month, however, there was a problem: all of the local races were planned on weekends when I would be out of town.  So it looked like my run for this month would be homemade.  And since I was going to be doing it on my own anyway, I decided not to a 5- or 10K.  Heck, I do that every morning in my "regular" run.  I wanted to do something different.

So I planned the First Annual Makeshift Marathon: I mapped out a 1-mile track in my neighborhood and set a date (yesterday) to run it 26.2 times.

I expected it to be hard.  I expected pain.

But I had NO idea.

The first 16 miles weren't bad.  The last 10: woah!  Much much much harder.  Around mile 19 or 20, my knees were killing me.  I'd sort of forgotten that I've had bad knees since I was a teenager--or maybe I just underestimated how much of a problem it would be.  Bottom line is that I finished, but I definitely had to walk the last few miles.

And I've been hobbling around ever since.


I seriously hope the first part of this t-shirt slogan is true:

Otherwise, the name of this historic race will be changed to:

The First AND LAST Annual Makeshift Marathon.

MOJ

Year of Loss

It was one year ago today.

I had been watching my weight climb higher and higher for a decade and had failed at a dozen attempts to stop slipping down that hill.  I had finally hit 220 lbs.--not just overweight--on the verge of obesity.  It was a wake-up call.  I gave up treats and began to make progress--for the first time in 10 years.  But after a year of my best efforts, I had still only lost 10 lbs. 

Then, on June 19th of last year, I found LiveStrong.com and it gave me the tools that made my journey possible. 
 
It hasn't always been easy sailing.  As I look at my weight loss chart on LiveStrong.com, I can see a 4-month period of setback-ing--I got sick, school got hectic, I got "holiday-itis" . . . and I gained back half of the weight I had lost.  But early this year, I got back on that treadmill and began making progress again.

I even went from walking to jogging, something I never thought I would be able to do.  Just a few months earlier, I couldn't get through 3 consecutive days of jogging without horrific pain from shin splints.  Suddenly, I could jog again, and I began to dream of training for a race.  In March, I ran my first 5K.  I ran another in April and another in May.  This month, I ran a 10K.  I jog 5-10 kilometers (3-6 miles) six days a week.

And it feels great!  Just over a week ago, I finally reached my goal weight of 170 lbs.--fifty pounds from where I began.  (C thinks I look better at 175, so I've since put a couple of pounds back on.)  It is SUCH a good feeling to have finally accomplished something that felt so impossible for so long. I literally feel better than I have in years--healthier, stronger, younger.  And I have more energy than I've had in a long time.

I can't describe how good it feels to have reached this goal!

Now, my goals are changing.  Rather than trying to lose weight, I now need to maintain my weight.  And while that seems like it should be easier than losing, it's a challenge for me.  Frankly, "just say no" is easier for me than "moderation in all things."  Once I have some of something I love, it's really difficult for me not to overindulge.  (It's already been a struggle--putting back on those pounds C recommended was way too easy--it took me one day!  One!  Do you know how long it takes me to lose 5 pounds???)

So I'm beginning a new adventure: welcoming chocolate back into my life without being dismembered by my inner Treat Hulk.

I'm ready for the challenge.

Bring it.

MOJ

Race #4 (June) -- 10K

Ran my first 10K today--the (first annual) Tour de Gravity sponsored by our stake.  It was grueling!  The race began way down the hills on 2nd Avenue, came all the way up to 18th Avenue, and then returned back down to 2nd Ave--a vertical ascent of 226 yards (678 feet) from bottom to top.  In other words, take a normal 10K and add a climb of more than the length of two football fields!

Brutal...

...but fun.

Very glad I did it.  I was having some back pain earlier in the day, so I debated about whether to run at all, and if I ran, whether I was really up to doing a 10K--maybe just stick with the 5K, since I know I can handle it.  But I decided to run the longer race and, despite a (literal) flash of terror moments before the race began (and a Tic Tac mishap soon thereafter), I survived.  I knew if I could just make it to the top of the course, the 2nd half of the race would be almost entirely downhill.

With the intensity of the climb and the subsequent descent, it was a wild ride.  My legs already feel like jelly.  I'm not looking forward to how sore I'm going to be tomorrow!

MOJ

Crossroads

Just been thinking about how much I love being back in Utah--the Crossroads of the West--because it doubles as the Crossroads of the Family (probably since Mom lives nearby).  My brother Brian was in town last week--we dropped everything to drive down to Provo to see him.  Family, lots of laughter, and Olive Garden.  Doesn't get much better than that! We also got to see Rick and Ashley within the past few months, each as they were in town for just a day or two.

We didn't get to have family "just passing through" very often before moving back here--Texas, northwest Washington, and Pennsylvania were a bit too far off the beaten path, I guess.

It has truly been a blessing to be here.  Still blows me away sometimes.

MOJ

Scarred for Life

Once upon a time there were two kids who didn't really get along.  They bugged each other; they got into arguments; they got into fights--ongoing warfare.  It was a bit of a mess.

But Kid 1 was having a birthday party and, due to cancellation of one of his invitees, extended a last minute invitation to Kid 2.  When Kid 1's dad heard about that, he thought that was a pretty cool idea; it'd probably help usher in a new Era of Peace.

Kid 2 accepted the invitation and, despite the family's assurance that they did NOT need to do a last-minute shopping scramble, Kid 2 showed up at the party bringing a whole bag of fun little gifts for Kid 1.  Everyone had a ball, enjoying pizza, eating loads of cake and ice cream, playing with the gifts, etc.  They had a LOT of fun!  The Era of Peace seemed certain.

...until the next school day.

That's when Kid 1 tormented Kid 2 beyond his breaking point, resulting in Kid 2 hulking Kid 1 across the room and (probably unintentionally) into the edge of a bookshelf. 

Kid 1 spent the rest of the day in the hospital, coming home with a new birthday present: 12 stitches and (most likely) a lasting facial scar.

Fitting, given that he's the Son of Markenstein.

Sigh.

Race #3 (May) -- 5K

My worst race ever...

...as far as my time goes, anyway.

This was the "High Fives 5K" race--free to register, open to everyone, and right her in our own neighborhood.  As I pointed out in a previous post, L wanted to run it with her friends.  R decided to run it with her friend as well, and the boys were going to run it with me.  And we invited some friends, Neighbor1 and Neighbor2 (not their real names) to join us--their mom recently broke her arm, so she couldn't exactly run a race since, as you might have noticed last time you ran anywhere, your arms sort of swing back and forth a bit while you run.

So J, S, Neighbor1, and Neighbor2 ran with me, L ran with her friends, and R ran with a friend.  S made it .6 mile and J made it 1.5 miles (though, admittedly, he rode a fair amount of that on my back).  R dropped out after about 2.7 miles, partway up the "Heartbreak Hill" of the course.  I tried to tell her that if she could make it up the rest of the hill (.2 mile), the remainder of the race was a piece of cake--only another .2 mile and all downhill.  But she had never run that far before, and was feeling like she was going to be really sick.  So her friend Neighbor3 tagged along with the remaining 3 from our group (Neighbors 1 and 2 and me), and we finished the race in about 45 or 50 minutes.

We even got medals.  (They give them to everyone who finishes in less than 55 minutes.)

But the best part was, a few minutes later, looking up and seeing my R coming down the home stretch.  She didn't give up!  She had rested for a few minutes and, once she felt imminent death had been averted, she got back in the race!

L and her friends finished too.  That was cool because their friend, who had wanted to run the race, had had surgery and couldn't run.  So the girls ran the race for her, "carrying her" by bringing her name on a piece of paper, taking photos for her on route, and picking up a medal for her at the finish line.  It was really thoughtful.

Way to go, kids!

MOJ

Race #2 (April) -- 5K

Ran my 2nd race today!  And I think I can almost use the word "ran" this time.  I pushed myself harder than I have yet--either in my last race or in training--and shaved about 6 minutes off my total time, coming in around 23:30!  A personal best.

They haven't posted the official times yet, but that was what my trusty watch said, so I'm going with it.  Plus, I'm not sure my time will be included in the official results.  Apparently, though I submitted my registration materials weeks ago (in person, at the sponsor's office), they had no record of my registration, so I wasn't on the entrants list.  They did go ahead and give me a number and let me race, but they didn't really get my information, so it was a bit disappointing.  There were only a dozen or so people who beat me to the finish (courtesy of a fairly small overall turnout), so I might have "placed" in my division.  As is, I don't think I was even assigned to a division at all.

Oh well.  Still had a great time, and was delighted with my improved performance.  Plus, the race officials said the event raised almost $7,000 for the Shriner's Children's Hospital--very impressive.  (I'm assuming there were some generous donors, because the number of entrants alone couldn't have raised that much money.)

Also, this race was in my own neighborhood--almost--so that was fun.  It began at the hospital, a mile or so southeast of our house, and followed 11th Avenue (a road I drive along every day) across the hills on the north side of the valley.  (See the route marked on the map; the blue arrow is our house.)  There really are some stunning views from up here (though I have to admit I missed them in my effort to get into Autopilot Runner mode!).  Two miles later, 11th Avenue dead ends at a beautiful little section of City Creek Canyon, and the race followed the road down to the bottom of the canyon and along the creek, just as the sun was climbing high enough to peak down over the edge of the canyon walls.

Beautiful.

It's one of the things I've loved about several of the places we've lived during the last decade--finding little oases of Nature within a stone's throw of the city's hustle-bustle.

Anyway, I had a great time.  I'm looking forward to the next race--that one truly will be a neighborhood race--our street even comprises 1/3 of the race route!  No official sponsors, no race numbers, no police escorts, no fancy timing clocks--just neighbors out running together.  It's hosted by the congregation-next-door, and it's FREE.

So I've invited the kids to run this one with me.  S accepted the invitation right away.  R's not so sure.  When I invited L, her response was something like, "Ummmm, no.  I don't think I want to."  Then, I told her that one of her best friends from school/church has run the race for several years.  Her response?  "Ohshe'sgoingtodoit?Wow,thatsoundslikealotoffunIthinkIwillraceafterallYeah,sheandIcouldruntogetherand..."

Sigh.

The Darndest Things

"My nose was naked so I stuck some pants on it." -- L
"Using the bathroom really passes the time." -- R

Race (the Noun)

Finished my first-ever 5K!

The race was the second annual Running of the Leopards race.  Click on the map to see the route--it began just outside Hogle Zoo (at the mouth of Emigration Canyon) and ended at East High School, which is famous for being (1) the school location for the High School Musical movies and (2) my wife's alma mater--GO LEOPARDS!

Oddly enough, neither my wife nor the High School Musical cast participated in the race.

But hundreds of others did.  It was really fun to see the huge crowd of people out there on a rather chilly "Spring" morning.  Are you sure it's Spring???  Maybe I should have waited until April to do my first race!

Actually, I had a blast!  My goal was simply to finish the race without stopping to rest/walk.  And I did it!  Well, I did stop for just a moment to tie an evil shoelace, but now I  know: next time, double knots!

My time was just under 30 minutes, which is a full 10 minutes faster than any of my trainings have been!  My guess is that's because almost the entire route was downhill, and the tiny stretch that was uphill was VERY mild! But hey, I'll take it!  It makes me sound faster than I really am!

Maybe even fast enough to justify my use of the word "race" as a verb someday.    

Someday.

MOJ

Update: When they posted the official race times on the USA Track and Field website, mine was posted as 26:30.  Now, I know that is not accurate.  The race clock AND my watch both said 29:30.  They're just being overly generous (not likely), or compensating for crowd-staggered start times (more likely), or doing some other mathematical voodoo for unknown reasons (even more likely), because I certainly wasn't that fast!

Train (the Verb)

I want to run a marathon.

Not any time soon.  But someday...

Trouble is: I've had such severe shin splints for more than ten years--jogging/running has been out of the question!  I tried all the solutions people recommended: stretching, many different kinds of shoes, etc.

Then, a month or two ago, the shin splints just went away.  I did happen to buy a new pair of shoes right around that time, but they're nothing special--pretty much the same as I always get.  So I don't know if it the shoes finally made the difference, but suddenly I can run again.  Okay, "run" probably isn't the right word, but jog-more-slowly-than-most-people-walk is hard to use as a verb.

And it feels great.  Not at time.  No, I'm so horribly-out-of-shape that the actual jogging is only slightly more pleasant than gargling battery acid. But afterward, I feel great, and I'm so glad I'm doing it.  (And, if you want the real truth, the actual jogging is getting easier too.)

So, for the first time in a decade, I'm training for a race.  Not a marathon.  Just a 5K.  (Baby steps, you know.)  I'm planning on doing one race per month this summer--one in Provo with family, one in Centerville with friends, others all by myself.  The first one comes up in a week!  I'm really looking forward to it.

Now I've just got to lay off the cookies.  Apparently I'm not supposed to eat junk while I'm in training.

Dang it.

MOJ

Spring

It's coming!  Can't wait!  We've had a few "teaser trailers" over the past month or two, which have been wonderful!  I'm looking forward to more.

I can't believe Winter was EVER my favorite season!  Oh, the SHAME of it!

MOJ